“What Does the Bible Say About a Man Making a Woman Cry” (song made in suno.com; lyrics)

When we reflect on relationships, especially between men and women, the Bible becomes an invaluable guide. One of the questions I often come across is, “What does the Bible say about a man making a woman cry?” While the Scriptures don’t explicitly speak to this exact phrase, the Bible has much to say about how men should treat women, and the principles it lays out can certainly address this issue.

In the Bible, we find clear directives about love, respect, and the care we should show to others—especially in intimate relationships. Whether a man’s actions cause tears through harsh words, neglect, or even thoughtless behavior, the heart of the issue lies in how we treat one another in light of God’s calling for our lives. This post will explore what the Bible teaches on this topic, drawing on both specific verses and broader biblical principles that offer guidance for how men should treat women with love and care, ensuring their emotional well-being.

The goal of this discussion is to reflect on these biblical principles and apply them to the way we interact with the women in our lives, making sure that we are mindful of their emotional and spiritual health, just as much as their physical safety.

Biblical Foundation of Love and Respect

When we ask, “What does the Bible say about a man making a woman cry?”, it’s important to start with the foundation the Bible lays for how men should treat women in general, especially within the context of love and respect. The Bible makes it clear that men are called to treat women with the utmost care and honor, which leaves no room for causing emotional harm or distress.

Ephesians 5:25 – Loving Like Christ Loves the Church

The first verse that often comes to mind when considering a man’s role in a relationship is Ephesians 5:25. Here, Paul writes, “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.” This is one of the most profound commands regarding the nature of love in a marriage. Christ’s love for the church was sacrificial and selfless, setting a standard that leaves no space for a man to cause harm, either emotionally or physically.

If a man is to love his wife—or any woman—with this kind of love, his actions should reflect care, patience, and empathy. This directly opposes anything that would cause a woman to cry through harshness or neglect.

Ephesians 5:33 – Respect for Emotional and Spiritual Needs

In the same passage, Ephesians 5:33 instructs, “However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.” The emphasis here is on mutual respect and love, with men specifically called to honor their wives as they would their own bodies. A man who respects his wife or the women in his life will naturally strive to avoid causing them emotional pain.

This applies beyond marriage. Whether we’re talking about a man’s treatment of his wife, girlfriend, daughter, or even a female friend or coworker, the command is to treat women with respect and kindness. Emotional harm—like making a woman cry through hurtful actions—would go against this biblical instruction.

1 Peter 3:7 – Treating Women with Understanding and Honor

Peter offers additional guidance in 1 Peter 3:7: “Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your wives, and treat them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs with you of the gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayers.”

This verse emphasizes the importance of understanding and honoring women. While the phrase “weaker partner” can sound controversial, it’s not about women being inferior, but rather refers to physical differences, particularly in that historical context. The key point, however, is the call for men to treat women with thoughtfulness and dignity.

Peter stresses that men who fail to treat women with respect and kindness are even warned that it could affect their relationship with God. This underscores how important it is for a man to consider his actions, knowing that emotional mistreatment—such as making a woman cry—doesn’t align with God’s desire for loving and respectful relationships.

Biblical Relationships Quiz

Test your knowledge of biblical principles in relationships by answering the following questions:

The Call to Avoid Causing Emotional or Physical Harm

While the Bible doesn’t explicitly mention a man making a woman cry, it provides clear guidance about how we should treat one another, especially in terms of avoiding harm—whether physical, verbal, or emotional. The Bible addresses the power of our words and actions, highlighting the importance of being mindful in all our interactions.

Proverbs 12:18 – The Power of Words to Heal or Hurt

In Proverbs 12:18, we find this powerful statement: “The words of the reckless pierce like swords, but the tongue of the wise brings healing.” This verse vividly describes the dual potential of our speech. Words have an immense impact—they can cut deeply, inflicting emotional wounds, or they can bring healing and restoration.

When we think about making a woman cry, we must consider how our words are often at the root of emotional pain. Harsh, thoughtless, or unkind words can cause deep wounds. But on the other hand, words spoken with wisdom, care, and love have the power to uplift and heal. This principle applies to all relationships but is especially important in intimate or close relationships where vulnerability is greater.

Colossians 3:19 – “Do Not Be Harsh”

Colossians 3:19 gives men a very direct command: “Husbands, love your wives and do not be harsh with them.” Though this verse specifically addresses husbands, the principle of not being harsh extends to all men in their relationships with women.

Being harsh doesn’t just refer to physical violence or aggression—it includes verbal abuse, emotional manipulation, and even the neglect of a woman’s emotional needs. A man who is harsh with his words, impatient, or dismissive of a woman’s feelings may easily cause her to cry, which goes against the clear biblical mandate to act with love and gentleness. When the Bible instructs men not to be harsh, it implies that we should instead be kind, gentle, and attentive to the emotional well-being of others.

Matthew 7:12 – The Golden Rule

The Golden Rule, as found in Matthew 7:12, teaches: “So in everything, do to others what you would have them do to you.” This principle, though simple, has profound implications for how men should interact with women.

If we consider how we would feel if someone caused us emotional distress, we can better understand why God calls us to treat others with the same care and consideration we desire for ourselves. No man would want to be treated in a way that brings him to tears through hurtful words or actions, and the same goes for how we treat women. The Bible calls us to a higher standard, one in which empathy, kindness, and love guide our interactions.

Emotional vs. Physical Harm

Although many think of harm primarily in physical terms, the Bible equally condemns emotional harm. Whether it’s through cutting remarks, neglecting a woman’s emotional needs, or even subtle actions that undermine her dignity, these behaviors can cause significant emotional distress. God’s call to love and respect others encompasses both the emotional and physical aspects of relationships. A man’s words and actions should bring peace, security, and love to the women in his life, not fear, sadness, or insecurity.

Examples of Righteous and Unrighteous Treatment in the Bible

When considering the bible and what it intimates about a man making a woman cry, it’s helpful to look at examples of how men treated women in Scripture. These stories offer lessons, both positive and negative, about the importance of treating women with respect, care, and love.

Boaz and Ruth – A Model of Respect and Protection

One of the most beautiful examples of a man treating a woman with dignity and kindness is the story of Boaz and Ruth. In the book of Ruth, Boaz, a wealthy landowner, meets Ruth, a poor Moabite widow. Rather than dismissing her or treating her harshly due to her low status, Boaz goes out of his way to protect and provide for Ruth.

In Ruth 2:8-9, Boaz tells Ruth to glean in his fields and even commands his workers not to bother her. He shows her kindness and respect, making sure that she is not only physically safe but also emotionally secure. Later in the story, when Ruth approaches Boaz for marriage, he continues to treat her with honor and integrity, ensuring that everything is done according to the law and with respect to her character and position.

Boaz’s actions show how a man can treat a woman with grace, kindness, and protection. He not only avoids causing Ruth emotional distress but actively works to make her feel valued and cared for. This is the biblical standard for how men should act toward women, even in difficult or complex circumstances.

King Saul and Michal – A Cautionary Tale of Emotional Neglect

In contrast, we see the negative example of King Saul and his daughter, Michal. In 1 Samuel 18, Michal falls in love with David, and Saul agrees to give her to him in marriage. However, Saul’s motives are selfish—he hopes that by marrying David to his daughter, he can control or trap David.

Later, in 1 Samuel 19:11-17, Michal helps David escape from Saul’s murderous plans. Instead of appreciating her loyalty, Saul’s treatment of Michal deteriorates over time. By the end of her story, Michal is emotionally neglected and manipulated, living out a tragic and loveless marriage with David. Saul’s lack of care for his daughter and his selfish use of her for his own purposes undoubtedly caused her emotional pain.

This story serves as a warning about the emotional harm that comes when men use women as tools to achieve their own ends, rather than treating them as valuable individuals made in the image of God. Emotional neglect, manipulation, and selfishness can easily lead to deep emotional wounds, as we see in Michal’s life.

David and Bathsheba – The Consequences of Mistreatment

The story of David and Bathsheba, found in 2 Samuel 11, is one of the most well-known examples of a man’s mistreatment of a woman in the Bible. David, seeing Bathsheba bathing, abuses his position of power to summon her and sleeps with her, leading to tragic consequences.

Although the Bible doesn’t explicitly describe Bathsheba’s emotional state, it’s not difficult to imagine the emotional and psychological toll this event must have had on her. Not only was Bathsheba’s husband, Uriah, later killed on David’s orders, but she was thrust into a relationship that began with abuse of power and manipulation. David’s actions serve as a powerful reminder of how a man’s mistreatment of a woman can lead to devastating outcomes, not only for the woman but for the man himself.

Later in the story, David repents of his sin (Psalm 51), but the damage had been done. The consequences of his actions brought pain and loss to Bathsheba, himself, and their child. This story teaches us that when men misuse their authority or treat women as objects rather than as image-bearers of God, the emotional and spiritual harm can be profound.

These biblical examples give us both positive and negative illustrations of how men have treated women throughout history. The story of Boaz and Ruth provides a model of kindness and protection, while the stories of Saul and Michal, and David and Bathsheba, show the emotional harm that can result from selfishness, manipulation, and the abuse of power. These examples help us reflect on how men today should treat women in a way that aligns with biblical principles of love, respect, and dignity.

Practical Application for Modern Men

Having explored the biblical foundations of love, respect, and the examples of righteous and unrighteous treatment of women, it’s important to ask how these principles apply to our lives today. As men, we are called to reflect the love of Christ in our relationships, and that includes being mindful of the emotional and spiritual well-being of the women in our lives.

Emotional Awareness: Recognizing the Impact of Words and Actions

One of the most important things men can do is become more emotionally aware. We live in a world that often dismisses or undervalues emotional sensitivity, especially among men. However, the Bible calls us to be emotionally intelligent and to consider how our words and actions affect others.

As Proverbs 12:18 reminds us, “The words of the reckless pierce like swords.” Even unintentional comments or actions can have a profound impact on someone’s emotional health. Taking the time to understand how our tone, body language, and choices affect the women in our lives is a vital part of living out biblical love.

This awareness extends beyond just avoiding overtly hurtful behavior. It’s about being proactive in speaking words of encouragement and affirming the women around us. Instead of merely avoiding making a woman cry, men should aim to be sources of emotional strength and comfort, lifting others up with kind and loving words (1 Thessalonians 5:11).

Seeking Forgiveness and Restoration

There will inevitably be times when, despite our best efforts, we cause harm. The Bible is clear that no one is perfect, and we all stumble in many ways (James 3:2). When this happens, the biblical response is not to ignore or minimize the pain caused but to seek forgiveness and restoration.

James 5:16 instructs us, “Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed.” If a man realizes that his words or actions have caused emotional harm to a woman—whether intentionally or not—he should seek her forgiveness. This requires humility, the willingness to admit fault, and the desire to make amends.

The process of healing and restoration isn’t just about saying, “I’m sorry.” It involves genuinely understanding the harm caused and making changes to avoid repeating the same mistakes. As men, we must be willing to repent, just as David did after his sin with Bathsheba, and strive to treat the women in our lives with greater love and care moving forward.

Building Up, Not Tearing Down

One of the most practical ways to live out biblical principles in relationships is to actively build others up rather than tear them down. This is especially true in close relationships, where words and actions have a significant impact on a woman’s sense of security and well-being.

Ephesians 4:29 advises us, “Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.” In practice, this means speaking words of affirmation, encouragement, and kindness. Instead of responding in anger or frustration, men are called to be patient, gentle, and understanding, particularly in difficult moments.

This applies not only in romantic relationships but in every context—whether it’s with a wife, girlfriend, daughter, mother, or friend. The call to build others up is universal, and men should aim to reflect Christ’s love in every interaction.

Honoring Women as Co-Heirs of Grace

In 1 Peter 3:7, men are reminded to treat women as “heirs with you of the gracious gift of life.” This concept speaks to the equality and value of women in God’s eyes. Women are co-heirs of the same grace that men receive, and they deserve to be treated with the same dignity, respect, and love.

Understanding that women are equally loved and valued by God should shape how men interact with them. The Bible calls men to honor women, not just through words but also through actions that demonstrate their worth and value. This means standing against any form of emotional manipulation, neglect, or abuse and ensuring that our relationships are characterized by mutual respect and love.

Now that we’ve explored how to practically apply biblical principles in relationships, take a moment to reflect on your own behavior with this Relationship Health Checklist. This interactive checklist will help you assess how well your relationships align with biblical teachings.

Relationship Health Checklist (Based on Biblical Teachings)

This checklist helps you reflect on how your relationships align with biblical teachings. Tick the boxes that apply to you:

Conclusion: God’s Desire for Healthy, Loving Relationships

In exploring the Bible and what it says about a man making a woman cry, we have seen that while the Bible may not directly address this phrase, it provides a clear framework for how men should treat women in all relationships. Scripture consistently calls men to love, respect, and honor women, and it condemns any form of emotional, verbal, or physical mistreatment.

The examples we looked at—such as Boaz’s kindness to Ruth and David’s mistreatment of Bathsheba—offer us important lessons. They remind us that our actions and words have lasting impacts on the emotional well-being of others, and as men, we are called to reflect Christ’s sacrificial love in all of our relationships.

Ultimately, God’s desire is for healthy, loving relationships that mirror His love for us. Whether in marriage, friendships, or family relationships, men are called to be protectors of both the physical and emotional well-being of the women in their lives. This means being mindful of our words and actions, seeking forgiveness when we fall short, and building others up through love and respect.

As we reflect on these biblical principles, I encourage all men to take time to examine their relationships. Are there areas where you might have caused harm, intentionally or unintentionally? If so, consider taking steps toward reconciliation, seeking forgiveness, and committing to live out the biblical principles of love and respect moving forward. Through prayer, reflection, and the guidance of Scripture, we can all strive to be men who bring healing and hope rather than hurt and harm.

Scholarly Citations

1. “A Biblical-Theological Framework for Human Sexuality” – The Gospel Coalition
   This resource dives into how biblical sexuality encompasses love, respect, and mutual care. It also discusses the relational nature of love in biblical ethics, emphasizing that love must be sacrificial and attentive to the needs of others, including emotional well-being ​(The Gospel Coalition).
2. “Toward a Theology of Love” – Cairn Magazine
   This article defines biblical love as inseparable from truth and righteousness. It argues that love, in its biblical sense, is not just an emotion but an active pursuit of the good of the other, which includes protecting them from emotional harm. It highlights that making a woman cry, if done through neglect or harsh words, is a violation of biblical love ​(Cairn Magazine).

Further Reading and Other Resources

1. “The Meaning of Marriage” by Timothy Keller
   Keller’s book is an excellent resource on understanding the biblical foundations of marriage, love, and respect. It discusses how men and women are to reflect Christ’s sacrificial love in their relationships, which would naturally preclude causing emotional harm.
2. “Love & Respect: The Love She Most Desires; The Respect He Desperately Needs” by Emerson Eggerichs
   This well-regarded resource emphasizes the biblical principles of love and respect in relationships. Eggerichs explains how emotional harm, including causing tears through neglect or harshness, disrupts the biblical balance of love and respect.
3. “Recovering Biblical Manhood and Womanhood” edited by John Piper and Wayne Grudem
   This book tackles the roles of men and women in light of Scripture, discussing how men are called to lead in a way that honors and cares for women, ensuring their emotional well-being.
4. “Sacred Marriage” by Gary Thomas
   Thomas argues that marriage is designed to make us more Christlike. He emphasizes the importance of kindness and emotional care in relationships, highlighting the spiritual consequences of neglecting a partner’s emotional health.